But, she then explained to us how she had a fear of falling at her home and having no one to be there in the case of something happening; for my mom it was hard to hear and we would leave scared and afraid for her safety. There were two women who lived with her at the time and would often have police show up at our Aunts door looking for them and were not really there to be of any help.
Then a conversation took place between our Aunt,mom & I and her grandson; the three of agreed to find a house for all of us to live in, one was found in Lakewood and it seemed that it was a great house. We moved into the house in September of 05 just after mom had wrist surgery ( ligament was torn ) and all seemed great; her old house in South Gate was sold and the plan was to use the funds to perform a few home improvements and make it a place that she could live out the rest of her life and that we could help take care of her, It was a joyous time.
For the first few years everything seemed to be going well. Our Aunt talked of finally being able to take a fun vacation with her sister and to do things that would make her happy, but when the funds from the sale of the house didn't show up and when less than ideal work on the house began, the three of us started to question what was going on. The funds never came and it broke our Aunts heart.
Both Alzeimers and Dementia crept in and the pain of seeing her broken was devastating; what made it just as bad was the fact that no one in her immediate family bothered to comfort or even speak to her to ease the obvious emotional toll she was going thru.
In June of 2014, she fell and broke her hip
requiring surgery to repair and her stay in the hospital was for a period of three weeks. However during a post surgery check-up, cancer was found in her right lung and at the age of 94, doctors determined chemotherapy would weaken her immune system and leave her very susceptible to pneumonia, now wait and see were the operative words.
Then just weeks later, she would dislocate her pelvic bone after rolling out of bed and during a consultation with doctors, the cancer had spread throughout the right side of her body; hospice care was our only option since there was no way that my Mother and I could care for her, mom having a bad back and I working six days a week. Even so, her family showed up on only a few occasions to visit her which was something their grandmother, our aunt didn't deserve. All they did was question what she was going to do with her money of which she had none and they knew that! They only visited her when they wanted something and not when it mattered the most; that devastated her to no end
On October 9th, Mom and I visited her at hospice, while she laid in bed, she told us to come close to her, then gave both us a big hug and kiss and told us how much she appreciated and loved us for being there and taking care of her. To be quite honest, it really helped us to grow closer to God and to appreciate the time we all shared with one another.
Then we got a phone call
On October 11, 8:45 pm approximately one hour after visiting her, our Aunt Rita C Shade passed away at age 94 due to lung cancer. The years that she shared with not just us, but the years she stayed with my grandmother (my mothers mom) which gave my mom the opportunity to have a job as manager of a Hallmark store was a blessing. I believe that it spoke volumes of the kind of person that Aunt Rita was, caring as well as sharing and at the same time made you laugh and appreciate the blessings that came along with it. However, what was to come after death we were never prepared for.
Aunt Rita's granddaughter would file elder abuse charges against my mother claiming that she violently shook our Aunt and that we were the cause of our Aunts downfall, that left us with no alternative to pay rent and left is scrambling for help. We called the landlord and told him of our Aunts death and he seemed very sympathetic to our situation and told us we would be allowed to make up the rent at a later date. However just one week later on October 17, a day before her funeral, the Landlord placed upon the door a notice to pay rent or quit, which left us in a complete state of shock. Then he took us to court to force us to pay rent, so we all went before a mediator to resolve the matter and all parties agreed that all rent would be made up at a later time. Or so we thought.
At the beginning of the new year in January, the landlords son stopped by the house asked us when we would turn in the keys, when we told him that we had agreed to make up the rent, he ran to his Dad's car, told him what we had said, then he threatened us with calling A Marshall from the Police Department to evict us from the property; this took place around the evening of January 3rd of this year.
I called the Long Beach CA courthouse and asked if any of this was legal and in no uncertain terms the Court Bailiff stated that Landlord must physically serve the eviction papers in person
But the decision was made that both mom and I had had enough and we moved out of the house on January 6th. Now my mom had to do all of the packing herself because during the beginning of Jan, I had to work six days a week to help make ends meet and to help establish income as well as good credit in the hopes of finding an apartment. That has been the most difficult part of this entire deal, and that's finding a place to live and without good credit or with great income, it becomes even harder.
Since the 6th of January, we've been staying in nothing but Extended Stay and Motel 6's, owing to the fact that neither Mom nor I have good enough credit and would need a consigner to even rent an apartment, which has been the most difficult thing to deal with, plus the cost of various necessities, makes you wonder how can anyone survive in this this world at this time.
With help from a co-worker, we've been able to rent a room at 500 a month, even that isn't the most ideal situation with three different tenants living in a 2 bedroom apartment Mother and I Struggle with looking for the reasons why this is happening to us and the both of us come to the same conclusion and its this; that God wouldn't have allowed it to happen if He did not have an express purpose in bringing us closer to Him. Everything that God himself does even when it seems like he isn't there to carry us, He carries us and that is one thing both mom and I hang all our beliefs on. For we both know that He provides us with what we need and He will always be there to call upon.
You may say why tell your story on what is happening to you and your mom and it's simple: ever since we've rededicated our lives to God, being honest and open has been the best kind of medicine, to show how God can change anyone's life for the better. The openness and communication between us has helped us to hold onto each other with love in our hearts and the belief that there will be a miracle keeps us going on the path that brings us closer to God.
I want to thank everyone for being there as a friend for both Mom and I and we want to wish you all the best for an awesome rest of the year
God Bless
Jay
Help us find an apartment, we don't deserve this Help us find a place to live
